It’s been a while since I’ve written a personal post, but today I’m sat here inspired to write.
I spent a few days this week in London, having travelled from here in Scotland. Going from trains, planes and more trains. A few years ago, days like this would have been completely unbearable and I would have made my excuses and stayed at home.
In 2016 I made the same journey, to the Mind Media awards, nominated for the Blogger of the year. Having started this blog in 2014, during a very difficult period of my life. I wouldn’t have imagined 2 years later I would have been stood on a stage collecting an award for it.
A lot has happened in the 2 years since.
My recovery has taken many twists and turns. I have discovered new coping mechanisms (running!), had moments where I’ve felt rock bottom and unsure how I would get back up again.
Recovery will always be an ongoing thing for me. I’m sure my coping mechanisms will chop and change as the years go on too. and that’s ok. I don’t always feel like running, sometimes I just need to focus on getting sleep.
I’m learning that those low days don’t always mean, that I’m in for months of the dark cloud following me, sometimes though, it is. I just have to take the time to look after myself during those low days. Self care is something I know a lot of others find difficult, especially when feeling unwell.
Today, my head is full of all the things I should, could, would do, but I’m doing none of them, because my body and my mind need the time to just ‘be’ for a few days.
Recovery is not a straight line, sometimes I feel like I have a handle on it and others, not so much. However, no matter where I am on that recovery road, I will be kind to myself. I know I am worthy of living a full life.